Whether you’re checking in about your own relationship, supporting someone else, or concerned about a young person, these quizzes are here to help you reflect—confidentially and without pressure.
Is This Abuse?
A private self-check to help you better understand what you’re experiencing.
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How Can I Help Someone I Care About?
Guidance for supporting a friend, family member, or loved one.
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Is a Young Person in Danger?
A reflective check for parents, caregivers, educators, and trusted adults concerned about a child or teen’s safety.
Take the quiz
Is This Happening to Me?
(For Teens & Young People)
A private check-in for teens and young people to reflect on relationships or situations that don’t feel right.
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Is This Abuse?
For a private check in
Sometimes it’s hard to recognize abuse when you’re in it. This confidential quiz is designed to help you reflect on your experiences. There are no right or wrong answers, and you don’t need to label what you’re experiencing to deserve support.
Important:
This quiz is not a diagnosis, legal determination, or professional assessment.
It’s a private self-reflection tool to help you think about your experiences
and decide whether you’d like support.
Your responses are not reviewed, scored, saved, or shared.
You are not required to take any action based on your answers.
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For confidential support, contact the
NEWS Crisis Line: 707-255-6397 (24/7).
1. Do you ever feel afraid of your partner or someone close to you?
Feeling afraid in a relationship is important information. Fear often signals that something isn’t feeling safe or respectful. You deserve relationships where you feel secure and at ease.
Not feeling afraid can be reassuring. Still, it’s okay to keep noticing how you feel over time. Safety includes emotional comfort, not just the absence of fear.
2. Does someone try to control where you go, who you see, or how you spend money?
Control can show up gradually and may feel confusing. Healthy relationships allow choice, independence, and trust.
Having freedom in your decisions is an important part of healthy connection. It’s okay to expect that space for yourself.
3. Have you been pressured into sexual activity you didn’t want or weren’t comfortable with?
Pressure around sex is not okay. Consent should feel clear, mutual, and respected at every step.
Feeling respected in your boundaries matters. You always have the right to say yes or no, without pressure.
4. Are you often blamed, insulted, or made to feel worthless?
Being put down can slowly affect how you see yourself. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity and respect.
Feeling valued and respected is foundational to healthy relationships. It’s okay to hold onto that expectation.
5. Does someone monitor your phone, social media, or online activity?
Monitoring can cross personal boundaries and affect your sense of privacy. Trust doesn’t require constant checking.
Privacy and trust are important. It’s okay to have parts of your life that are your own.
6. Have you changed your behavior to avoid upsetting someone?
Adjusting yourself out of fear or tension can be exhausting. It may help to pause and consider what feels authentic to you.
Being able to be yourself without fear of consequences is a meaningful sign of emotional safety.
7. Does someone threaten to harm you, themselves, pets, or people you care about?
Threats are serious and can create fear and pressure. You don’t have to manage this alone, and support is available.
Not experiencing threats can feel stabilizing. Safety includes knowing no one is using fear to control you.
8. Are you prevented from working, accessing money, or making financial decisions?
Financial control can limit independence. Everyone deserves access to resources and decision-making power.
Having access to money and choices supports independence and safety. It’s okay to value that autonomy.
9. Have you been hurt physically, or threatened with physical harm?
Physical harm or threats are not okay. Your safety matters, and help is available whenever you’re ready.
Not experiencing physical harm is important. Still, safety includes emotional and psychological well-being too.
10. Do you feel isolated from friends, family, or support systems?
Isolation can happen slowly and can make situations feel heavier. Connection is a powerful form of support.
Maintaining connections can be grounding. It’s okay to protect those relationships.
11. Have you ever felt unsafe leaving or ending a relationship?
Feeling unsafe leaving is a significant signal. You deserve support that respects your pace and choices.
Feeling able to leave safely matters. It’s okay to expect that freedom in relationships.
12. Does something about your relationship feel wrong, even if you can’t explain why?
You don’t need proof or words for your feelings to matter. Trusting your instincts can be an important step.
Feeling settled can be reassuring. It’s still okay to check in with yourself as things change.
If any of these questions felt familiar, you’re not alone.
Abuse can take many forms, and your feelings matter.
You don’t need certainty or answers to reach out.
Support is available — free, confidential, and at your pace.
Talk to an Advocate
NEWS Crisis Line: 707-255-6397
(24/7, free & confidential)
Safety & Privacy:
These quizzes are anonymous and confidential.
Your responses are not saved and are not a substitute
for professional assessment.
How Can I Help Someone I Care About?
For friends, family members, and loved ones
For friends, family members, and loved ones
It can be hard to know what to do when someone you care about may be experiencing abuse. This quiz offers guidance to help you reflect on what you’re noticing and how you might offer support—without taking control or causing harm.
Important:
This quiz is not a diagnosis, legal determination, or professional assessment.
It’s a self-reflection tool to help you think about what you’re noticing
and how you might offer support.
Your responses are not reviewed, scored, saved, or shared.
You are not required to take any action based on your answers.
Support is available if and when you choose.
If you are in immediate danger, call 911.
For confidential support, contact the
NEWS Crisis Line: 707-255-6397 (24/7).
1. Have you noticed changes in their behavior, mood, or communication?
Noticing changes shows care and awareness. You don’t need to understand everything to be supportive. Paying attention is a meaningful first step.
Not all changes are easy to see from the outside. Staying open and observant over time can still make a difference.
2. Do they seem afraid of upsetting a partner or someone close to them?
Fear of upsetting someone can signal an imbalance of power. It’s okay to gently notice this without pushing them to act.
Not seeing this can feel reassuring. Still, people may hide fear, especially around those they care about.
3. Have they become isolated from friends, family, or activities they once enjoyed?
Isolation often happens gradually. Your continued presence and consistency can be an important source of connection.
Maintaining connections can be protective. It’s still okay to check in if something changes later.
4. Do they make excuses for someone else’s harmful behavior?
Making excuses can be a way to cope or stay safe. You can hold concern without criticizing or correcting them.
Noticing accountability can feel positive. Keep listening for how they describe their experiences over time.
5. Have they mentioned being monitored, controlled, or threatened?
These experiences can be frightening to talk about. Taking them seriously and listening without judgment matters.
They may not feel ready to share everything. Letting them know you’re a safe person to talk to can help.
6. Do they seem anxious about money, housing, or transportation?
Practical stress can be connected to safety or control. You don’t need to solve it to offer support or help them explore options.
Not seeing these concerns doesn’t rule out other challenges. Each situation looks different.
7. Have you witnessed or suspected physical, emotional, or sexual harm?
Seeing or suspecting harm can feel heavy. You don’t have to carry this alone, and guidance is available.
Not witnessing harm can be reassuring, though some experiences happen out of sight.
8. Do you feel unsure what to say because you don’t want to make things worse?
That hesitation is common and understandable. Listening, believing, and staying connected are often more helpful than saying the “perfect” thing.
Feeling ready to talk can help open doors. It’s still okay to move at their pace.
9. Have you avoided bringing up your concerns out of fear of pushing them away?
Wanting to protect the relationship shows care. You can express concern gently without forcing a response.
Being able to speak openly can be supportive. How you say something often matters more than saying everything at once.
10. Do you worry about their safety, even if they haven’t asked for help?
Your concern is valid. You don’t need permission to seek guidance for yourself or learn how to support them safely.
Not feeling worried can be reassuring. Trust yourself to notice if that changes.
Talk to an Advocate
NEWS Crisis Line: 707-255-6397
(24/7, free & confidential)
Safety & Privacy:
These quizzes are anonymous and confidential.
Your responses are not saved and are not a substitute
for professional assessment.
Is a Young Person in Danger?
For parents, caregivers, educators, and trusted adults
Children and teens don’t always have the words to describe abuse or trauma.
This quiz can help you reflect on signs that may indicate a young person needs support.
NEWS advocates can provide information, support, and resources,
but cannot replace emergency services, legal counsel, or medical care.
Important:
This quiz is not a diagnosis, legal determination, or professional assessment.
It is a self-reflection tool designed to help you think about your experiences
and decide whether you’d like support.
Your responses are not reviewed, scored, saved, or shared.
You are not required to take any action based on your answers.
Support is available if and when you choose.
If you are in immediate danger, call 911.
For confidential support, contact the
NEWS Crisis Line at 707-255-6397 (available 24/7).
1. Have you noticed sudden changes in their behavior, mood, or school performance?
Changes can be a young person’s way of communicating distress.
You don’t need certainty to pause and seek guidance.
Not noticing changes can be reassuring.
Continue to check in as situations and environments shift.
2. Do they seem withdrawn, fearful, or unusually anxious?
These signs can indicate stress or feeling unsafe.
Your calm attention and presence matter.
Not seeing these behaviors doesn’t rule out concerns.
Some young people mask how they’re feeling.
3. Have they expressed fear of a specific person or situation?
Specific fears are important to take seriously.
Listening without pressure can help them feel safer sharing.
They may not have the words yet.
Keep space open for conversation.
4. Are there unexplained injuries, frequent illnesses, or complaints of pain?
Physical signs can sometimes reflect emotional distress.
It’s okay to seek guidance even without clear answers.
Not seeing physical signs can be reassuring,
though not all harm leaves visible marks.
5. Have you noticed changes in sleep, appetite, or hygiene?
These changes can be signals of stress or overwhelm.
Gentle curiosity can be more helpful than correction.
Consistency can be a positive sign.
Stay attentive if routines shift.
6. Do they show signs of depression, self-harm, or emotional distress?
These signs deserve attention and care.
Support is available to help you understand next steps.
Not seeing these signs can feel relieving.
Trust your instincts if concerns arise later.
7. Have they mentioned inappropriate sexual behavior, contact, or messages?
Sharing this takes courage.
Responding calmly and seeking guidance can help protect their well-being.
They may not feel ready or safe to disclose.
Let them know they can talk to you anytime.
8. Do they avoid going home, school, or certain places?
Avoidance can signal fear or discomfort.
Exploring this gently can help uncover what they need.
Feeling comfortable in daily spaces can be reassuring.
Stay alert to changes.
9. Have they become secretive about their phone or online activity?
Secrecy can sometimes indicate fear, pressure, or boundary issues.
Curiosity and support are often more effective than punishment.
Noticing openness can be positive.
Continue talking about online safety and trust.
10. Does something feel “off,” even if you can’t point to a specific reason?
Your instincts matter.
You don’t need proof to seek consultation or support.
Not feeling concerned can be reassuring.
Trust yourself to notice if that feeling changes.
If you’re concerned about a child or teen, you don’t have to be certain to reach out.
Guidance and support can help you respond in ways that are safe, thoughtful, and trauma-informed.
Supporting someone does not mean making decisions for them.
Everyone’s safety and choices are their own.
If a child is in immediate danger, call 911.
Talk to an Advocate
NEWS Crisis Line: 707-255-6397
(24/7, free & confidential)
Safety & Privacy:
These quizzes are anonymous and confidential.
Your responses are not saved and are not a substitute
for professional assessment.
Is This Happening to Me?
A private check-in for teens and young people
Sometimes relationships or situations don’t feel right, but it can be hard to know why.
This short, private quiz is here to help you check in with yourself, this is not a diagnosis.
There are no right or wrong answers, and you don’t have to share your results with anyone.
You deserve to feel safe, respected, and supported.
Your answers are private. They aren’t saved, shared, or reviewed by anyone.
If you’re in immediate danger, call 911.
You can also contact the NEWS Crisis Line: 707-255-6397
(24/7, free & confidential).
1. Does someone make you feel scared, pressured, or uncomfortable?
Feeling scared or pressured is important. You deserve to feel safe around the people in your life.
Mixed feelings can be confusing. It’s okay to pay attention to moments when something doesn’t feel right.
Feeling comfortable is important. Keep noticing how people make you feel over time.
2. Has someone touched you or asked you to do something sexual that you didn’t want?
That’s not okay. You have the right to decide what happens to your body.
Uncertainty still matters. Consent should always feel clear and comfortable.
Feeling respected in your boundaries is important. You deserve that.
3. Do you feel nervous about saying “no” because of how someone might react?
Feeling afraid to say no can be a sign that something isn’t healthy. Your boundaries matter.
It’s okay to notice moments where saying no feels hard. Those feelings are worth paying attention to.
Being able to say no safely is important. You deserve that kind of respect.
4. Does someone check your phone, messages, or social media without your permission?
That crosses personal boundaries. Everyone deserves privacy.
Even occasional checking can feel uncomfortable. Trust doesn’t require constant access.
Privacy is part of healthy relationships. It’s okay to protect yours.
5. Has anyone told you who you can talk to, where you can go, or what you can wear?
Being controlled can feel limiting or confusing. You deserve choice and independence.
Rules or pressure that don’t feel fair are worth noticing.
Having freedom in your choices is important. It’s okay to expect that.
6. Do you feel blamed, embarrassed, or put down by someone you’re dating or close to?
Being put down can hurt your confidence. You deserve to be treated with respect.
Even jokes or comments can sting. Your feelings are valid.
Feeling respected matters. It’s okay to hold onto that expectation.
7. Has someone threatened to hurt you, themselves, or share private information about you?
Threats are serious and can feel scary. You don’t have to deal with that alone.
Even hints or jokes about harm can feel heavy. It’s okay to take that seriously.
Not experiencing threats is important. Safety includes feeling emotionally secure too.
8. Do you feel pressured to send photos or messages that make you uncomfortable?
Pressure around photos or messages isn’t okay. You get to decide what you share.
If you feel unsure, that’s important. Consent applies online too.
Feeling in control of what you share is important. You deserve that respect.
9. Have you changed your behavior to avoid upsetting someone?
Changing yourself to keep the peace can be exhausting. You deserve to be yourself.
Small changes can add up. It’s okay to notice when that happens.
Being able to act like yourself is a sign of emotional safety.
10. Do you feel confused about whether a relationship or situation is healthy?
Confusion is common. You don’t need to have everything figured out.
Mixed feelings are okay. Healthy situations usually feel clear more often than not.
Feeling clear and confident can be reassuring. Keep checking in with yourself.
11. Have you ever felt unsafe at home, school, online, or with someone you know?
Feeling unsafe matters. You deserve support and protection.
Even occasional fear is worth noticing. Your safety is important.
Feeling safe is important. It’s okay to trust that feeling while staying aware.
12. Does something feel wrong—even if you can’t explain exactly why?
Your instincts matter. You don’t need proof for your feelings to be real.
Uncertainty can still be meaningful. It’s okay to trust yourself.
Feeling settled can be reassuring. It’s still okay to check in with yourself later.
If any of these questions felt familiar, you’re not alone.
What you’re feeling matters. You don’t need to figure this out by yourself,
and you don’t have to decide anything right now.
Support is available, and you deserve help that respects your choices.
Talk to an Advocate
NEWS Crisis Line: 707-255-6397
(24/7, free & confidential)
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